Dear Reader,
My dear friend, alpha reader, and work wife Ms Melinda got really mad at me yesterday and I would like to say that is was very
much not my fault.
Let me explain, some years ago Ms Melinda came to visit me in New York City. We were going to attend a writer's conference, see a few shows, eat all the good food, and have genuinely wonderful time. And we did.
But unfortunately for her, Ms Melinda caught a cold halfway through. It wasn't enough to stop her from enjoying the things we were doing... but it did leave her with an earth-shattering snore that shook the admittedly thin walls of my tiny New York apartment.
Ms Melinda refused to believe me when I told her. She accused me of exaggeration, playing a
joke on her, and generally making fun.
All things I obviously would never do *blinks eyes innocently*
So on the third night, while I was laying awake, a room away, wondering how such a small person could make such
a big sound...I decided to record it.
For reasons involving threats of death, bodily harm, and the fact that Ms Melinda does actually know where I sleep, I am not allowed to share that recording in this newsletter. But allow me to assure you it is a bone-rattling sound that is reminiscent of a hibernating bear or heavy construction work.
I forget that I have the snore recording in my phone for months at a time. However every time I remember I have it, it never fails to make me smile. Both because it reminds me of the fun time Ms Melinda and I had on that trip and because she sounds like a grizzly bear sleeping off a hangover and that will never ever not be funny to me.
What can I say? I am a sentimental person!
Astonishingly, Ms Melinda feels differently about my possession of said recording. And the other day when she remembered still I have it, we had a...spirited disagreement on the subject
that ended with her buying me three London Fogs out of spite.
